It's official. I fell into a state of Christmas Freak Out. In a previous musing, I peacefully contemplated our lack of time to prepare for Christmas and what a gift that has been to our prayer life. Well, for the first time in a month, we spent the weekend at home, and what did I do but make ridiculously long lists of Christmas tasks to accomplish only to end up in a puddle on the couch on Monday night with 7 sealed Christmas cards, two wrapped gifts, half-finished mint brownies for the neighbors and my loving, patient husband to console me.
So what did we do? We decided to send Epiphany cards, wrap most presents when we arrive at my mother's house, and finish the brownies at some point before we leave. It is time to let go.
Giving up control is an on-going theme for me this Advent. From Christmas preparations to travel plans to my own interior thoughts and emotions, I have been called, repeatedly, to give control to God and trust that He will lead me by the hand to accomplish the necessities of life in a loving manner (i.e. refrain from sitting my husband down to tell him how inconsiderate he is for not helping me with a list of To-Dos he was not even aware of). In contemplating the circumstances surrounding the birth of Jesus, I am continually reminded of Mary's fiat, her yes, in which she trusted God to conceive our Lord within her, for the life of us all. And as hard as it is, I want to be the handmaid of the Lord as well, living on His terms.
So to all of our family and friends, you can look forward to receiving some Epiphany-love in the next couple weeks.